A First

What is a blog anyway I wonder as I start my first. I could look it up really, but maybe it’s more fun to ponder, guess, and create my own representation. I think it’s a place to pause, reflect, maybe rant. A place to dive deeper into myself with the hopes of uncovering something and also sharing this thought, idea, light bulb moment, and/or pause to breathe with others.

Today I wonder why we struggle as parents. Why is it so hard sometimes, and then that sometimes can feel like all the time? Is the joy still there? Was it there? We each have our own story that got us to this place. As children unfold into the world there is an initial co-regulation. Baby can not survive without their guardian nearby. Although soon, before our eyes they unfold and find themselves. They begin to explore not only themselves but all the nuances of our world. The world keeps getting bigger as they go from all fours to two and then they cruise away.

From birth our goal is their independence, although that wasn’t my first thought when my children were born. Does this goal change how we view their “no’s”, “mine’s”, and “I hate you’s”? I wonder…

Children can bring out our biggest emotions. Often they show us our best and worst traits. They bring out our laughter, joy, biggest tears, hopes, and fears. They shine a mirror on our vulnerable parts giving us an opportunity to grow. Their being can cause us to try to do better, see things differently, and give us hope.

I will seek out the joy today and lean on grateful when other emotions arise. To the village of parents in the world. You are not on this journey alone. Hope to see you again…

Have some thoughts, share them here.